HONESTLY… AM I GOING CRAZy?
Mental health has been a transformative part of my life, helping me understand myself in a new light, the world around me, embrace who I truly am, and accept that my path doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. Well, I’m still working on that acceptance, but at least I am much more aware now.
I’m incredibly grateful to my psychologist Nensi Friszl Zečević mag.psych. for supporting my idea to bring a glimpse of our sessions to the public, because if nothing else, I hope it sparks a healthy conversation, and maybe it even inspires someone. The Honest Blog exists for exactly this reason: to share my truth, unapologetically.
You will definitely get to know me better by the time you scroll down, so be gentle & welcome to my mini therapy session.
1. Why do I still feel like I’m racing against time at 32? It feels like I’m running out of time, like I haven’t accomplished what I planned in terms of family, and my career. The pressure keeps growing, and I don’t know if it’s coming from society or if we’re all just “wired” this way. Why does everything feel so difficult—finding a job, earning a good salary, keeping a job, moving out of my tiny apartment after seven years, being a good daughter, good wife, keeping in touch with everyone, seeing everyone, etc.?
The feeling that time is slipping away comes from high personal standards and comparison to societal ideals, which are often unrealistic. When frustration over unmet goals in family, career, or personal life arises, ask yourself: when was the last time you adjusted your expectations to align with your actual desires? Are you focusing on small, achievable steps, or are you only looking at the distant final goal? The key question here is: who is really putting this pressure on you? If your loved ones don’t measure your worth by what you have yet to achieve, then you might be your own biggest source of stress. Change happens when you recognize that you can choose how to react. Consider which pressures are truly yours and which are external. Setting healthy boundaries can help reduce the feeling of being overwhelmed. Searching for a job, earning a higher salary, moving to a bigger place, and maintaining relationships are all long-term challenges. Breaking big goals into smaller, manageable steps, can help you avoid feeling paralyzed. In moments of frustration, instead of succumbing to self-criticism, acknowledge your efforts and remind yourself that mistakes and challenges aren’t signs of failure but opportunities for learning and growth. Patience doesn’t mean passivity; it means actively accepting reality while working toward change. By developing resilience toward challenges, you’ll start appreciating each step forward.
2. Is it normal to feel lost even later in life? How do you cope with it?
Absolutely—feeling lost is completely normal, regardless of age, especially when life priorities and expectations shift. As you grow, your values and priorities evolve, and the process of self-discovery becomes more defined, which can create uncertainty. Feeling lost often means you're at a crossroads, which is an opportunity to redefine who you are, and what you truly want. Sometimes, this phase helps you discover a new path that better aligns with your current vision. Psychologists emphasize the importance of accepting transitional phases as part of personal growth, where change is inevitable.
3. I am a very persistent person, and for the past four years, I’ve been trying to work exclusively on what I love. But it’s becoming harder and less financially viable. How do I deal with the unpredictability of my career and the thought that everyone around me has stable jobs, and good salaries while I’m barely making ends meet? Sometimes I feel selfish for continuing to pursue my passion, but I don’t know how to change that feeling. Am I doing something wrong, or do I need five more therapy sessions?
This struggle is common among creatives and those who follow their passions. Did you truly expect that loving what you do would immediately bring financial security, or were you prepared to build your value through perseverance? The real question is: what is "enough" for you? What seems like a lot to someone else might feel like too little to you, and vice versa. The most important thing is not to ignore the fact that you’ve put in a lot of effort without seeing the desired results. If that’s the case, it may be time for an honest evaluation: do you value yourself enough, and have you utilized all your resources? It’s also crucial to consider what “job security” means to you. Would you really be happy with fixed rules and a stable environment? If giving up your purely creative path isn’t an option, perhaps you can find a way to balance your passion with stability, allowing for additional sources of income. People who follow their dreams aren’t “selfish”—they’re determined. However, it’s equally important to set a time frame to assess whether you feel valued, satisfied, and recognized or if it’s time for a "Plan B" that balances what you love with practical life needs. Comparing yourself to those with seemingly stable careers can be destructive. Instead, focus on your own progress and how you can adapt to a constantly changing market. Every career path is unique, and your persistence is valuable in itself.
4. Imposter syndrome is, of course, a daily struggle for me in any field I enter—you’ve probably already noticed since the first time we’ve met :) Does this feeling fade with age, or do we just have to learn to live with it?
Imposter syndrome is like an inner critic that occasionally takes over and amplifies self-doubt, even when there’s objective proof of your success. It is possible to live without it—maybe not entirely, as it stems from deeply ingrained self-critical thoughts—but you can learn to recognize these thoughts as negative and gradually reduce their power over you. The key is developing a more realistic view of your achievements and accepting that doubt is sometimes a natural part of growth. However, it doesn’t have to control your life.
5. I wrote in my first blog post about the “curse of perfection,” and sometimes it sounds ridiculous—how can perfectionism be a problem. But for me, it truly is, and it causes anxiety. From needing to clean my kitchen perfectly to cooking perfectly, to constantly feeling like I have to prove myself to others—at work and even in my personal life. Why do so many young women today feel like they have to be perfect in every aspect of life, or they’ll completely lose their worth? How can we free ourselves from this?
Perfection is often an illusion imposed by comparison culture, social media, and our own high standards. Women today face increasing pressure to be everything—successful in their careers, family life, friendships, personal lives; beautiful, well-groomed, energetic, and always positive. This “successful woman” label inevitably creates anxiety and leads to exhaustion. The solution lies in spontaneity and the decision that "good enough" is often the perfect way to live—with flexibility and acceptance of our imperfections. Setting realistic goals, practicing self-compassion, and finding humor in our flaws are the first steps toward breaking free from this burden.
6. In the past two years, I’ve lost two friendships that were very meaningful to me. Why is it so hard to maintain friendships in your thirties? I know I didn’t do anything wrong, but I still feel like I’ve failed in that area too.
Friendships in youth often flourish effortlessly, but as life circumstances change—careers, family obligations, moving to new places—so does the dynamic of relationships. Losing close friendships in your thirties doesn’t mean you’ve "failed" in this area; it’s a natural part of life’s cycle. Sometimes, friends grow apart simply because their interests and priorities evolve in different directions. Instead of seeing it as a failure, try to view it as a reflection of life’s natural transitions. Relationships that endure are often those that adapt to these changes, while others fade to make room for new, more aligned connections.
7. I frequently feel like I’m not succeeding in life. One part of me is aware of my qualities, intelligence, and abilities, but the other part keeps growing with the thought that I must be doing something wrong. A few weeks ago, I told my husband that I feel like we’re going to end up living under a bridge, that nothing makes sense, and that I don’t know how to get either of us out of this constant cycle of trying and failing.
If someone feels this way, what is the first step toward change?
The first step is recognizing that your feelings are not proof of your incompetence, but rather a signal that something in your life needs to be re-evaluated. Have an open and honest conversation with Dino to clearly and concretely define your shared goals. Acknowledge your past successes without constantly comparing yourself to others, and set clear, realistic tasks that will allow you to experience a sense of accomplishment. Your worth is not measured by your current doubts, but by who you are and what you continuously build.
8. Burnout has been a widely discussed topic for the past few years, but honestly, I still think people don’t fully understand what it actually is. How can we recognize the first signs of burnout, and what is the difference between stress and burnout? Are there any techniques that can help us cope with it?
Stress is a natural response to challenges and responsibilities, while burnout is a state of chronic emotional and physical exhaustion that arises after prolonged exposure to stress. It often comes with feelings of helplessness and detachment from work or life in general.
The first signs of burnout may include:
Constant exhaustion
Feelings of cynicism
Decreased motivation
Reduced productivity
Key techniques for preventing and alleviating burnout include:
Setting boundaries: Learn to say "no" when necessary.
Taking regular breaks: Incorporate short breaks into your daily routine and plan time for recovery.
Exercise, relaxation techniques, and meditation: These help calm the mind and restore focus.
Self-care: Prioritize sufficient sleep, a healthy diet, and physical activity.
Seeking professional support: If you feel like you're on the edge, consider reaching out to a therapist.
9.And finally, honestly am I going crazy? When should we seek professional psychological help, and when can we process our emotions on our own?
Feeling lost, overwhelmed, or even "crazy" is not unusual—these are signs that your internal system is overloaded in some way. Seeking professional help is not a sign of weakness but of courage and self-care.
If you find it difficult to process emotions, constantly struggle with negative thoughts, or notice that daily life is becoming unbearable, it’s time to seek professional support. A psychologist can help clarify your thoughts, set realistic goals, and teach strategies for coping with challenges.
Ultimately, taking care of your mental health is an investment in yourself—and we all deserve to live a fulfilling and balanced life.
- Nensi Friszl Zečević, mag.psych.
